Got a bag of rubbish to get rid of? Well, think again! Thetford residents will now need to plan their bin-dumping escapades with military precision, as the Telford Way recycling centre rolls out a new “book ahead” policy starting November 18th. Yes, you heard right—even if you’re just swinging by on foot with a single old toaster, you’ll need to secure a slot like you’re booking front-row tickets to Glastonbury.

This change isn’t exclusive to us, though. Norfolk’s seven recycling centres are all embracing the new system, meaning you’ll need to be organised with a capital O just to get rid of your garden clippings and that pile of old cardboard boxes. The online booking system goes live on November 11th, giving us a whopping week’s notice to figure out how to navigate it. You can book a slot up to seven days in advance—because clearly, our waste disposal requires the same level of forward-planning as a holiday.

Councillor James Bensly, the cabinet member for environment and waste, assures us that this isn’t just some harebrained scheme, but a carefully considered change that’s already in place in Suffolk and Essex. Apparently, it’s going to “reduce congestion and improve waiting times.” Now, that might sound plausible for the A11 during rush hour, but a recycling centre? Really?

“Our site staff will have more time to help customers,” Bensly claims. One wonders how many of us need assistance chucking an old microwave into a skip, but hey—maybe there’ll be a red carpet rolled out for those of us lucky enough to get a 10:15am slot.

But here’s where it gets truly bonkers: everyone needs a booking, including those arriving on foot or bicycle. So if you were planning to drop off that old TV you’ve been lugging around, you’d better make sure you’ve got a reservation. No word yet on whether we’ll need to scan a QR code on arrival or if there’ll be a maître d’ to show us to our designated disposal point, but we can only hope.

Business and trade waste customers are also in for a treat with new pricing changes. No more straightforward per-bag charges—now it’s based on vehicle size and waste type, as if calculating the dimensions of your van is anyone’s idea of a good time.

The Re-use Shop, on the other hand, will still be accessible without a booking—unless, of course, you’re hoping to drop off a bit of rubbish alongside your browsing. Then, you guessed it, you’ll need to book that elusive slot. It’s hard to say how many spur-of-the-moment recyclers will be caught out by this new rule, but it’s sure to add an extra layer of “fun” to what’s usually a simple trip to offload junk.

The council insists these changes are to ensure “the costs of disposal of trade waste are fully covered” and to provide “a fair and consistent price for traders.” Translation: they want to make sure everyone’s paying their dues and not sneaking in an extra black bag under the radar.

So, what does this mean for us regular folk? Long gone are the days of chucking your recycling into the car and popping down to Telford Way on a whim. Now it’s all about schedules, time slots, and—dare we say it—maybe even the risk of missing out on a prime rubbish-dumping window.

For those who already felt taking the bins out was a chore, the hassle level has just been dialled up a notch. But, look on the bright side—at least the council’s giving us the chance to sharpen our online booking skills. Who knew being eco-friendly could be this complicated?